My Black Friday Shopping: Flex Ecoobost, SRT8 300, Carmax E60 M5.

"sm70- why not Duesenberg?" (sm70-whynotduesenberg)
11/29/2014 at 16:49 • Filed to: opposite lock, carmax

These cars could be ranked by their performance (fast, faster, fastest), number of cylinders (6, 8, 10), or how good of a decision they would be for us to buy (good, questionable, horrible). Either way, we liked all three of them, and all three cost under $36,000.this

Let's start with the more interesting of the three. This M5 had a manual and just 55k miles on the odometer. It sounded nice, and, to channel my inner Tavarish, could be bought for less than the price of a new Camry, if you included things like upgraded TRD tire valve caps on the Camry. While you're reading, I'd like to clear up a few points made by some obscure auto journalist a few years back (a Mr. Jeffery Clarkson or some such, I think it was), !!!error: Indecipherable SUB-paragraph formatting!!! :

1. The E60 has grown better looking with age. I love the Bangle design.

2. Yes, there are many stupid settings. My dad kept asking me, "What does this do?" or "What does that stand for?". I instructed him to ignore all of them.

3. The engine clatters a little when you start it, but sounds nothing like any diesel I've ever heard.

4. This one was a manual, which worked fine.

5. The ride comfort is not wonderful, but not as awful as was claimed.

6. The iDrive. Oy vey. I'm 16, I'm supposed to know how to work shit like this. But it was baffling. While the GPS never interrupted, it took forever to figure out how to switch the radio off. And I never did, I finally figured out how to turn it all the way down and left it at that. What a stupid computer system.

7. He's right. The tuns signal either won't activate or won't self-cancel correctly. Still, as it would appear to be the only BMW ever fitted with turn signals, that is to be expected.

8. We pushed the M button and left it on. It works. And yes, the adaptive bolsters are cool.

9. Holly balls. 507hp. This thing is batshit crazy fast.

That about sums it up, really. The interior is the most German thing I've ever seen, the noise is not my favorite, but it's pretty good, and Jesus tap dancin' Christ that is a rapid car. We got a salesman who was fresh out of college and newly hired, and we made his day by flying up the on-ramps and scaring old folks in Buicks. He, in turn, made ours be being completely unable to engage reverse and back the car out of the space. After a few minutes of him trying and insisting it was broken, my dad hopped in and backed out as easy as pie. It was hilarious.

Yet as much as I loved the M5, I still prefer the CLS63 we drove more than half a year ago. It looked sexier, sounded even better, went just as fast, and felt cooler, more dramatic, and more badass in every way.

The Carmax bumper-to-bumper full warranty that would last an additional 75k miles was an option, but thanks to a certain Ferrari-driving blabbermouth, that warranty was well over eight thousand dollars. Combine that with horrible gas mileage and scary insurance bills, plus being stuck home in winter, and the M5 is very much out of the running. But still a ton of fun.

The 300 was the same price, but had much fewer miles. It was also more reliable (presumably) more comfortable, bigger, and generally more practical. It wasn't as much of a driver's machine as the M5, but it's a DD, not a track toy. Obviously, it was slower than the M5, but still plenty fast. And it didn't sound as good as I hoped. Unlike the M5, it's not out of the running completely, but being a RWD car that gets horrific mileage, it's still not the top contender.

Which, by default, means it was also a fun car.

The biggest surprise was the Ecoboost Flex. It is exactly like our car, only faster. No nice noise, no fun driving dynamics, just a startling amount of speed. Trouble is, the Polestar XC70 offers TT V6 speed, but beats out the Ford in every other way but space. So the fast box is still our close second choice.

Also, smiley face.

DISCUSSION (15)

Steve in Manhattan > sm70- why not Duesenberg?
11/29/2014 at 17:00

When I was 15, my dad was ordering yet another in a series of poorly-equipped Impalas. Enjoy this.

Jordan and the Slowrunner, Boomer Intensifies > sm70- why not Duesenberg?
11/29/2014 at 17:01

Needs more Eisenmann:

sm70- why not Duesenberg? > Steve in Manhattan
11/29/2014 at 17:04

Believe me, I am. Although I didn't get to drive any of these three. Oh well.

sm70- why not Duesenberg? > Jordan and the Slowrunner, Boomer Intensifies
11/29/2014 at 17:04

DAT NOISE

Steve in Manhattan > sm70- why not Duesenberg?
11/29/2014 at 17:21

Good. I'd like to be sensible, but I'd buy the M5 - I'd just finance the warranty. And I've seen both cars in the metal - I sure like the new one better. But if I had a choice of anything in the range, it would be the M4. Seen a regular 4 in traffic, and even in standard trim it's an astonishingly good car.

Steve in Manhattan > sm70- why not Duesenberg?
11/29/2014 at 17:43

Remind me - what do you drive again? And what's dad's pick so far?

Milky > sm70- why not Duesenberg?
11/29/2014 at 17:43

Is that SRT 425hp or 475? Also there is nothing wrong with RWD, unless you live in Buffalo.

sm70- why not Duesenberg? > Steve in Manhattan
11/29/2014 at 17:53

I drive a 2001 A8L. My dad has a 2009 Flex, and his top pick so far is a 2010+ Volvo XC70 T6 Polestar.

sm70- why not Duesenberg? > Milky
11/29/2014 at 17:54

475hp.

And those cars, even with t/c and snow tires, would not do great in ze snow.

Milky > sm70- why not Duesenberg?
11/29/2014 at 18:00

Lies! There an opponaut somewhere on here that DD'd a SRT8 Challenger in Canada.

sm70- why not Duesenberg? > Milky
11/29/2014 at 18:01

Doesn't mean it's the best idea ever.

Milky > sm70- why not Duesenberg?
11/29/2014 at 18:44

Kinja'd!!!

glasshole1 > sm70- why not Duesenberg?
11/30/2014 at 06:04

Wild, l only paid $1,900 for my MaxCare warranty on my M5... And they're way over $20,000 deep. I got a red cog of death driving off the Carmax lot.

anothermiatafanboy > sm70- why not Duesenberg?
12/01/2014 at 13:16

Do you speak from experience? Modern TC and a good set of snow tires can be devastatingly effective.

sm70- why not Duesenberg? > anothermiatafanboy
12/01/2014 at 13:21

We had a Lexus GS300 (RWD), and a Ford Flex (FWD), both with Blizzaks on during the winter. They both went okay in the snow, and I'm sure a good set of snows on either the 300 or the M5 would be fine, but most of the other stuff we are looking at are AWD, so they'll do much better. And yes, the AWD cars will likely have snow tires too.